What do you think about this poem...?

I sat amongst the rubble


Of a life that seemed unfair,


I felt my spirit fleeing


To a pit of great despair.


Then an angel softly called


With a voice so fair and sweet,


She asked me of my sadness,


And the cause of my defeat.





'Twas difficult to answer


But the voice was very kind,


And patiently she waited


'Til my problems I outlined.





An understanding wisdom


She sought gently to impart.


With sweet words of sympathy


She began to reach my heart.





The loving angel touched me


As she wiped away a tear.


And in that very moment


Divine music I could hear.





Raising my eyes to see her,


I looked full upon her face,


Melancholy clouds dispersed


Leaving not a single trace.





The luster of purest gold


Had been borrowed for her hair,


Scintillation of the stars


Is also revealed there.





Residing in laughing eyes


Is the sparkle from a brook.


My thumping heart was melting


As she proffered me a look.





I've seen glorious sunsets,


Oranges, purples, pinks and reds,


Lovely flowers in gardens


Mountain lakes and river beds.





But now I've seen an angel


All the others I would trade,


In the beauty of her grace,


They simply start to fade.





I do not know the future,


But this prayer I've now begun:


Would this angel be with me


'Til my life on earth is done

What do you think about this poem...?
Beautiful! It can actually be a song if a chorus was added to it. It's very nice. Very rhythmic, words chosen well. It sounds as delicate as the angel that is described. It's gentle, clean, and clear and not clogged with unnecessary words. It's simplicity can make it very easy to memorize and recite by heart at a poetry reading.





Keep 'em coming! I enjoyed it.
Reply:wow that was fantastic . i loved how it gripped my atention in the beging and yet at the same time it made sense and then it didnt . it was great . i also like the way you wrote it to you have great tallent keep it up . =%26gt;
Reply:Excellent! I like your verse running in rhyming couplets with a cut at line five of your first stanza.
Reply:i like it